It's been a while since I wrote something. Time keeps moving forward. If I can encapsulate the past few months in a gist, it has been a roller coaster ride, full of ups and downs, but mostly downs.

Work has been overwhelming. But I met and continued to interact with wonderful people. I think I got closer to God in the past few months, incredibly closer. If only for that I am grateful. But it has been such a difficult time.

I've realized though that again I am gravitating towards the though of "everything in moderation." Moderation is better than deprivation. Deprivation leads to an insatiable domain. Moderation keeps one balanced, able to be in the middle of the world, in a balanced way, but being aware of the limitations.

I ignored the limitations in the past. This was my problem. Last Saturday I had half a wine bottle with a great companion. She was great to spend time with and great to be with for that somewhat major event.

I want to live a balanced life. I will not turn to it, nor to other things like drugs, in order to ease a pain that cannot be eased by anything. But I will also give myself some credit, that I was able to stay sober, alcohol free, for a good 7 months. It's a great way to reset the body and the mind.

Moving forward I hope I can live a more balanced life, be closer to the Lord God, continue to work hard, and build healthy relationships which in turn may lead me to having a family. A wife and kids. And a stable good job that I enjoy. Perhaps that is a life that I want to work hard for.

May you guide me Lord, and lead me through your light.

Best regards

Jay